Juicing room blues
by Theinflator, Dec 5, 2008, 3:10:53 PM
Literature / Prose / Fiction / Horror
Juicing room blues

By TheInflator

December 5th 2008

Otto looked at his clipboard and frowned; Mr. W’s obsession with his 3-course gum was putting a strain on the juice department, of which he was the supervisor. For years he’s had to deal with scores of blue women blown up like balloons, ready to explode at any moment. Getting them into the chamber before they grew to big to get into it, or grew too big to breath. He watches as another blue girl was rolled past him moaning, the movies never dealt with what you had to do to get gallons for blueberry juice out of a woman. Or the other more unpleasant things like the fluid seeping out of any hole if could find and the resulting mess was not that much fun to deal with or smell. Yes he was happy to have work and that Mr. W had saved his family generations ago, but having to work and save time for a personal life while learning new moves for the spontaneous dance numbers was beginning to stress him out. He was sure he needed a vacation, but was worried about the long line of blue women coming in everyday, there were a few times he wasn’t able to get the juice out in time and the ending were unpleasant and costly. Just then, Olive ran up to him. “Sir I think we have a problem, Miss Jones is swelling up at a very accelerated rate.”  Otto sighed, what could be causing that? Looking past Olive, he saw his workers rolling a very large blueberry woman who seemed to be swelling up as they rolled her. “Was she held in line too long?” He asked. “No” Olive said. “When we saw how fast she was growing and we rushed her down here.”  He looked over at the timer on the room, it takes around an hour to get the juice out of a woman depending on her size and age, they just put a girl in and she wasn’t going to be ready anytime soon. He had asked for funds for another room, but Mr. W said it wasn’t in the budget and they would have to wait till next year. He walked over to Miss Jones and saw deep blue stretch marks forming around her navel, putting a hand on her belly; he felt her still growing under his touch. She was going to go critical very soon.

“Okay people, we have a code blue.” (He always hated saying that) “Open up the containment room doors, get the blast shields in place. Come on people look sharp, unless you want to spend the rest of the day cleaning up!”  What looked like a solid wall, began to slowly slide back in two half’s. Opening up to a massive stainless steel room, workers started placing thick Plexiglas walls into place.  As he watched the room coming into shape he motioned to have them start to roll the rapidly inflating woman into the room. As she rolled by, he noticed her face, it was bloated and so swollen, her eyes were shut and her lips had swelled into a blue pucker. “Olga!” He shouted to one of the medical techs. “Did she fill out a medical history before she went into the testing lab?” Olga went to a wall computer screen and pulled up Miss Jones’s application, a quick review showed nothing strange. But Otto had a hunch. “I think she’s allergic to blueberries, we need to get an antihistamine into her stat!” Olga looked at Otto. “Sir, all we have are emergency injectors, if we use one of them she my explode.” “Damn” was all he could say as the now 8 foot tall blueberry woman was slowly rolled into the containment room. “Okay set up the shields and get ready for lock down, we need to get clear of her and get these door closed.” The team erected the clear containment walls and rushed away as the blast doors closed. Otto brought up the room on the control room monitors; she was still swelling and was starting to push the shields back with her massive body. Just then, Otto’s cell phone rang. “Yes sir, we have had a lock down, one of the test subjects has gone critical. We are not sure of the cause, but suspect she may have had an allergic reaction to the blueberries. Yes sir I know it’s in the fine print, but maybe if the print wasn’t so fine we could stop having problems like this.” The monitor showed the blueberry woman starting to fill the massive room. “Sir, I think this one may cause some real damage. No, not like what Tim Burton did to the last movie. Sir I have to go I’ll call you back, in a moment.” With that he clipped the cell to he belt and yelled. “Take cover, she’s going to blow!”  He had just enough time to duck behind a metal desk when a loud boom shook the complex and the blast doors were peeled back letting jets of blue fluid spray into the room. Otto stood up dripping with juice. “This is the part I hate the most, clean up.” His cell phone rang again, he wiped off as much of the sticky goop as he could before he put it to his ear. “Yes sir she’s gone and she took out a good portion of the containment room, can we please stop testing until I can get repairs done. Thank you sir, I will try to get things back into shape as soon as I can. No sir, I don’t think we need a new dance number for exploding girls. Sir I really need too….. yes sir I know you think Robin Williams or Jim Carry would have done better but we will just have to wait for another movie. Good day sir.” Otto stood rubbing his forehead as Olga walked over to him. “Sir I called in the clean up crews and the engineering department should be here in a few moments.” She said with concern on her face, she could tell the stress of the job was getting to her supervisor. “Thank you Olga, very much. Also get the CSI team in here too, I want to make sure we have a handle on what made her go boom.”